Wednesday, May 23, 2007

The TMI Files. A (Not Quite) Holy Trinity.

Magilla and I had a bit of a discussion this evening about where babies come from, which took the usual meandering path through dangerous territory.

There was an item on the tv about identical twin babies who, due to complications, were born too early and subsequently remained in hospital with tubes in their noses.

One in particular was very ill, and it was thought that he might die, but he didn't.

Because the smaller twin was tiny, I got the polaroid of Magilla off the wall and we looked at it for comparative purposes. She is 4 minutes old in the photo and still has the umbilical cord attached, and is crying, as you would expect. She is a caesar baby, and we looked at the scar where the doctor cut me to take her out.

Magilla says, "I should have come out your fanny*."

I replied, "Well, you were supposed to but you wouldn't. I think you were having too much fun so the doctor had to go in and get you."

Then she asked if Daddy made her with me, to which the obvious answer is yes.

So far so good.

Then came the classic: Did Jesus get my parts out of a box for you?

Hmmmm. How to answer that one?

That took us to how I had Jesus helping me make her while I ate properly and looked after myself.He made sure that I could do it properly.

And trying to explain how the umbilical cord works to a four year old is an exercise in mental gymnastics!

I managed to make it past that hurdle, and we got onto names.

Magilla's middle name is Grace, and she wanted to know why.

I told her that Grace is something that comes from God, and as far as I am concerned, she came from God too.

My middle name is not Grace, although apparently it should be. :)

My middle name being nothing out of the ordinary, I then said that I had another name, too. A confirmation name.

My confirmation name is Therese, and again, trying to explain the concept of Holy Communion in the Catholic Rite, and then Confirmation was a bit much for me.

Much laughter and confusion ensued.

It got really interesting when we got to being confirmed, and where you have to stand up in church and say how you believe in God and Jesus, and you disavow Satan.

Magilla: "Who is Satan?"

Me: "Satan is bad, he doesn't like God and does bad things." (Not exactly the theologian, am I? It's so much easier explaining to adults!)

Magilla: "I think I'll shoot him. He's a bad man."

Me: "I think what we'll do is leave that up to God. We just have to make sure we don't listen to him, and God can sort him."

Magilla: "How about we bomb him? Or I'll punch him with this!" (Indicates a small fist.)

Me: "Um, I don't think we want to bomb Satan. We probably won't actually see him." (Racks brains trying to find a way to change the course of the conversation.)

Magilla: "Okay, I'll just shoot him then."

Sees a new article on the television.

Magilla:"That's John Howard. He's a good man."

Me: "Yes, he is."

Magilla: "He's good like God and Jesus, isn't he?"

Me: "I think he's a good man, and does a good job, but he's not quite on their level."

Luckily for me, that pretty much ended the lesson. Rock on sunday school, where someone a lot more enlightened in the ways of educating little tackers in the minutae of christianity can explain it all properly.

I think the timing of this tonight was also quite propitious, seeing as over at Slaying Dragons (blogroll at right, too lazy to link tonight!), W.E. has linked to this:




*nb for American readers: fanny in Australia does not mean what it does in North America.

12 Comments:

At 10:09 PM, Blogger Zoe Brain said...

Sounds as if Magilla would get along well with Andrew, my son.

They're everything, aren't they? Our Hopes, our Dreams, Themselves, our Everything.

 
At 3:19 PM, Blogger MK said...

Thanks for posting this Nilk, allowing the rest of us a glimpse into your lives. I saw that vid over at slaying dragons a while ago, it's simply the best.

 
At 3:29 PM, Blogger Nilk said...

No worries, MK. My lefty friends are appalled, which cracks me up every time, and Magilla is now getting plenty of positive reinforcement lol.

I tell people that the indoctrination is proceeding apace just to see their horrified expressions.

It's a cack!

 
At 12:32 AM, Anonymous Bruce said...

Nilk, OT, I heard you were having a discussion over at Larvatious Porridge about Female Gen Mut in Australia, and apparently your correspondent responded, 'Instead of publicly shaming them, we should be trying to convince them it's wrong..'

Sociologists have long known there are fundamental differences in how cultures perceive right and wrong, and propose a division into 'guilt' and 'shame' societies.

Tribal cultures tend to work on public shame as a source of moral guidance, individual sense of responsibility is minimal, the goal of social action appears to centre on survival of the tribe/clan. Witness the recent crimes against women in Sydney and the way the whole family of the offender stands by him and blames his victim.

Public shaming is in fact the only practical way to teach such people what is wrong.

 
At 4:29 PM, Blogger Nilk said...

Bruce, I'm all for bringing back the stocks and also pillorying people.

Trying to guilt people into things doesn't work unless you're that way inclined in the first place.

It definitely doesn't work with me; I just dig my heels in and go my own way regardless. :)

So naming and shaming is high on my list rather than holding hands and saying "now, you know it's not good for you to do this to your daughter."

 
At 2:48 PM, Blogger LYL said...

I tell people that the indoctrination is proceeding apace just to see their horrified expressions.

hehehe. I don't get it that people who are all for indoctrinating their own children (or even other adults) into believing whatever crap they currently believe in (climate change, zero pop growth etc) are so shocked and horrified that you would want Magilla indoctrinated with your beliefs.

They're such hypocrites, it's hilarious!

I'm all for bringing back the stocks

Oh, Amen! I've been thinking that for a while, myself.

 
At 12:00 PM, Blogger LYL said...

btw, Nilk, OT and just out of curiosity, why do you read "Bad Feminist"?

As I say, just curious.

 
At 9:07 AM, Anonymous Annalucia said...

So what does ``fanny'' mean in Oz? In America (at least when I was small) it means the part you sit on.

 
At 9:24 PM, Anonymous TimH said...

annalucia, certainly, 'fanny' means a vag in the UK and I am pretty sure it's the same in Oz.

 
At 9:40 PM, Blogger Nilk said...

You're on the money, timh. :) It does indeed.

 
At 9:45 PM, Anonymous TimH said...

Yeah, I know nilk ;)
Ta.

 
At 9:56 PM, Anonymous TimH said...

Any new posts in the offing? It's been a while.Good reading here, :)

 

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